Monday, June 23, 2008

Just Gotta Have a Man! - A Spoken Word piece, by Vee

...So Speak it With Rhythm;-)

Why you always acting like you just gotta have a man?!!!
What is it about you that says alone you can't stand?
I mean,
don't get me wrong...
Right now I'm single too and sometimes I feel a little lonely,
But I know I loooove me some me.
And when I find that special one,
I'll make him my one and only.

But until then,
I refuse to run behind,
someone not even worth my time,
tryin' to use me or take what's mine,
and think it's his God-given right
...just cause God made him fine.

Believe me, what I have is awesome,
and definitely worth preserving.
Not to be given away so easily
to someone so undeserving.

So whatcha think 'bout what you got?
Is it worth a dozen roses, or a single forget-me-not?
And tell me, what values are you really teaching your daughter?
You're not taking care of yourself and your house ain't in order.

She's learning from you
and at the same time raising herself
And you want to know what HER problem is?

Ok, so why is it okay
that he hit you last night?
Eye still black. Lip "swole" up!
But I guess that's just alright,

Why is it okay
that you're alone this holiday,
while your man is having the time of his life
celebrating at home with his kids and...his wife?

Why is it okay
for him to hurt your kids and treat them bad?
And you wondering why they're making bad grades in school
and always looking sad.

And last, but not least...
Why is it okay
for him to talk to you like a child?
For him to belittle you and call you names
and wonder why you don't smile.

But you should be smiling
and you could be smiling!
Drop that &^(%##!!,
pick up the phone and start dialing...

Your loved ones, your friends,
the ones you trust to be there thru thick & thin.
You want a new life?
You want to be happy?
Then this is where you must begin.

Think support system, think sympathetic ears.
Who will listen and won't laugh at my tears?
Who will allow me to speak it out loud and release my fears?

And please take some time between this one and the next.
Every guy I hear you mention, you're calling him your ex.
Spend some time with you just getting to know yourself.
You've got to be confident and comfortable in your own shell.

Find a hobby.
Do you even know what it is you like to do?
Oh, I get it.
It's been so long that you've forgotten what pleases you.

Ok, so join a book club.
Take down a book from the ole dusty shelf.
Get back to loving your kids,
and honey get back to loving yourself!

Occupy your mind.
Fill your thoughts with sunshine.
Invite your kids to share with you their hopes and dreams,
and how they spend their time.

Plant a flower garden.
Dig in the soil and the dirt.
You know there are many hidden treasures
here on God's green earth.

Find someone or something else to give life and light to
besides that guy who so "thoughtfully" hurt you.
Drop them bags like Erykah told you to.
Be true to yourself and simply do you.

But forgive him
and all his deeds just the same,
So you can take back your power and
reclaim your true name.
Stop being his victim of shame.

And don't forget, exercise is always good,
especially if you'd like to shed a few pounds.
Try Yoga classes to relieve the stress.
You'll start to have more ups than downs.

You've worked on your mental
and you've worked on your physical,
so complete your circle, sis,
and work on your spiritual.
Before you know it,
you'll feel like a different person.
Oh, you'll still be you,
but just a better version.

You'll be ready for a partner.
Not just a man or any man,
but someone you can actually start to:

Share your dreams with,
watch TV and laugh with,
comfort and make love to,
or simply relax and chill with.
Let down your guard and cry on,
someone you can depend on
to see you through the tough times
or guide you through a storm.

And sweetie,
the men you will then attract
will make them sorry Kats look so slack.
Cause they will be kind, and gentle, and sweet.
And you won't have to ask them to watch your back.

So what about me?
I know so much, where's my guy?
Well I'm truly not a hypocrite,
so I will not lie.
Right now I'm still working on me.
Trying to be the best me I can be.
Not yet done with my metamorphosis,
But he should be along shortly is my guess;-)

So again I ask you...
Why you always acting like you just gotta have a man?
What is it about yourself that you just can't stand?
I mean,
don't get me wrong...
Right now I'm single and sometimes feel a a wee bit lonely,
But I know I looooove me some VEE.
And when I find that special one,
I'll make him my one and only.

How's that for some Jowaje Philosophy?

& Self Respect My Beautiful Sisters,


Sunday, June 08, 2008

Ever wondered what it's like to be Bipolar?

I found this awesomely beautiful spirit on youtube. She's funny and open and honest about her experience with this disorder. Please watch as she attempts to give us a raw glimpse into her life and what it's like to be her. Warning: This video contains adult language and may not be suitable for children.
And don't forget to check out her other videos on her Smile 2day, Tears 2morrow youtube page.
Bipolar Disorder II
Bipolar disorder, or manic depression, can be an extremely crippling obstacle to deal with for the individuals suffering from it. They are most times misunderstood. If you see them during their low or high periods, you are not seeing the individuals at all. What you're seeing is the effect that the disorder is having on them at that time. But the truth is that these folks are usually highly intelligent and very creative. If they've completed some type of notable work (ie. book or novel, painting, poetry, blockbuster movie, latest no.1 single) or excelled in some all-time favorite sport or popular hobby, they are called geniuses, stars, and sometimes even superstars! And although a few could possibly be called "a little eccentric," crazy is rarely the term used to describe them. It's only the regular, everyday people like you and me who would be stigmatized by Bipolar Disorder and made to feel ashamed or criticized for needing help.
Often times Bipolar Disorder is misdiagnosed because the person may seek help for the depression, but not inform the doctor or therapist of the mania. We all know what depression is for the most part. We know that depression is when someone is sad, loses his or her sense of self-esteem and self worth, and sometimes may even want to leave this earth completely. That's pretty easy to comprehend, even if you're not able to sympathize and empathize. So let's talk a little about the mania. Mania is the extreme ups or periods of happiness the person may be feeling. And if it feels good, why would he or she mention it to the doctor, right?
Well, extreme mania is marked by insomnia (difficulty sleeping) and hyperactivity. It WiLL feel good in the beginning, and if a person is on the arty side, this may be the time when they're able to create their greatest works. But soon after, if the mania continues, the person may become anxious and out of control, start multiple projects that never get finished, spend excessive amounts of money, and even indulge in some unusual and/or unsafe behavior. Some clues that a person may be cycling towards mania are:
  • Speech may get faster than usual
  • Thoughts may become very scattered and fragmented as the person jumps from idea to unrelated idea
  • Movement & activity increases (i.e. walking faster during normal activity)
  • Extreme increase in physical activity like exercising (i.e. going from working out 3x/week to 3x/day)
NOTE: The clues for cycling towards depression would be just the opposite.
Sleep deprivation, which is of course very unhealthy for the physical body to begin with, can cause a whole host of mental symptoms which can closely resemble psychosis. For the person affected by Bipolar Disorder, the manic phase can be just as bad as the depression phase because it is the exact, extreme, polar opposite, hence the term Bipolar - two poles. The body will be tired while the mind is constantly racing. The lack of sleep can cause paranoia, hallucinations (hearing and seeing things), delusions (believe things that are not true), aggression, and sometimes even violence.
The symptoms of bipolar disorder are as varied from person to person as hair color. They can be mixed, occur seasonally, cycle regularly or in no discernible pattern at all, have unequal duration in phases, occur sporadically or very often. Bipolar II disorder is defined as having the typical disorder, but the highs are not as high as in Bipolar I. They have periods of hypomania instead, so that aspect is less extreme, so to speak. There are other forms and variations as well, but I'm not going to get into them, as this is NOT a health site.
But I do encourage any of you reading this post, if you have any of these symptoms, or can relate to the young lady in the video, please see someone. Ask questions and educate yourselves. You don't have to be plagued by these unexplainable mood swings, and you are NOT alone. Being diagnosed is not a death sentence. It's actually a "life" sentence that can lead you to the path of a more fulfilled and happy life.
And in case you're wondering, the young lady featured in the video is feeling better today than she has in a long time. She sought help, found the right meds and found the right therapist. I'm so inspired by her strength and ability to not be afraid.
Vee to Miss Smile 2day: You go girl! You're absolutely awesome!
Love, Light, and Peace of Mind,

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