A real, unconditional, sustaining, nurturing, no holds barred kind of love. The kind of love that you feel when you look at someone so imperfect, but see only perfection. The kind of love that can't be bought or sold. The kind of love that has truly stood the tests of time and fear, and passed. The kind of love that has weathered every storm and was stronger for it...
This is the kind of love I received from my parents. After my mom passed a few years back, my dad was still there to pour it all over me everyday. But with my dad's passing recently, I couldn't help but cry, and one of the reasons was because I knew I'd never have this type of love again.
The other day I was thinking about it. I was thinking about him, and I began to cry more tears. I thought about how overly protective he was, and how he worried about me "too much." I thought about how he was my biggest fan and has supported everything I've ever done. I thought about how he was the best coach and counselor in the world. I thought about how wise and humble he was. I thought about his quiet inner-strength. And I missed him so much.
I couldn't help but feel sorry for myself. But right at the point of total dispair, I could see my wonderful, lovely baby boy in my mind's eye. My dad had poured all of himself into my son before he moved on. And he did so with purpose, so that there would be enough of him left here to sustain me. He knew me so well.
So that real, unconditional, sustaining, nurturing, no holds barred kind of love... well I never lost it at all. My son looks at me just the way my dad did. He loves me the same way my dad did. He inspires me the same way my dad did. And he thinks I can do anything.
The tears dried up so quickly that I almost forgot they had ever been there. I smiled and I wondered how I'd even questioned finding this kind of love again when it had been right there staring at me all the time.